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View Poll Results: How much did you pay for your engagement ring
< $1,000 32 6.60%
$1,000 - $1,999 37 7.63%
$2,000 - $2,999 28 5.77%
$3,000 - $4,999 74 15.26%
$5,000 - $7,499 90 18.56%
$7,500 - $9,999 66 13.61%
$10,000 - $14,999 72 14.85%
$15,000 - $19,999 31 6.39%
> $20,000 45 9.28%
I bought it more than 20 yrs ago and inflation has changed 10 2.06%
Voters: 485. You may not vote on this poll

 
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Quote this post and reply to it Post#1 @ 03-24-04 , 09:14 AM


Raech had a great idea with her thread. Let's try it again, with more choices.

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#2 @ 03-24-04 , 09:21 AM


There - I have placed the first vote - including my budget for the ring I am trying to purchase in the 10-15K range. Enjoy, all.

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#3 @ 03-24-04 , 09:49 AM


It won't let me vote.

Nevermind, it did now. Even though I have logged in 3 times.

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#4 @ 03-24-04 , 01:35 PM


My original E-ring was less than $200.00


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Quote this post and reply to it Post#5 @ 03-24-04 , 02:28 PM


actually MD- it's the wedding band that is used to solidify the marriage, not the e-ring. And that's why I will upgrade my ering till I can't lift my hand anymore- never my wedding band. Wouldn't be the first time someone found me disturbing!

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#6 @ 03-24-04 , 02:29 PM


and thank you in advance for not "going on"....

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Multiple e-rings?
Quote this post and reply to it Post#7 @ 03-24-04 , 02:39 PM


Having more than one "engagement ring" makes sense only under the very sad (albeit with some happy endings ) circumstances that would mean you were engaged at different times to different people.

I will probably get flamed for this, but regardless of what I do or do not buy or receive as gifts in the future, the ring I have now will ALWAYS be my "e-ring."

I love jewelry and can imagine wanting lots of it in the future if I/we can afford it or if my future husband (obviously if he/we can afford it) gives it to me. I can imagine having more diamond rings -- I love many cuts and styles of diamonds, especially antiques.

I can't lie -- I love having a nice diamond, but if the night he asked me to marry him he had slipped a $15 cz on my finger, that would have been my engagement ring. Any later ring(s) we'd buy would be wonderful adornments but not "upgraded engagement rings."

It drives me crazy to read posts about "this is my e-ring now" and "This was my e-ring for a week until I changed my mind" or whatever. Buy and wear as much jewelry as you want, and wear it on whichever finger you please. But calling it an upgraded "engagement ring" is not only absurd if you've been married x years but is insulting to the symbolic meaning attached to engagement rings. REAL engagement rings, I mean, be they intangible, unbroken circles of fidelity and love or a diamond that's smaller or differently styled than you want/can afford later.

Why the need to call newer, bigger, or different rings "upgraded e-rings"?? Is it to justify the expense? I just don't get it.


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Quote this post and reply to it Post#8 @ 03-24-04 , 02:52 PM


No flamies On Looker!!! We are all entitled to our own opionions and I think it's nice that you will keep your ring forever!!! Different strokes for different folks! Guess my marriage is nothing more than a sham and I don't appreciate the sanctity of my e-ring.

I'll have to try to live with that.....

but I will probably be distracted from my moral emptiness by the incredible sparkle of my new, UPGRADED E-RING as I cuddle up to my NON-UPGRADED HUSBAND... The Horror. The Horror.

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#9 @ 03-24-04 , 05:51 PM


I'm with Luluhb and Mary Alaina! Different people have different opinions about e rings and wedding bands and its all subjective. Just because someone chooses not to upgrade their e ring or wedding band doesn't make them any more married than someone who chooses to. Personally I feel that my e ring is a symbol to others, my committment to my fh is in my heart, not on my hand. I've seen threads on a few wedding boards where girls were absolutely chewed up for wanting to upgrade their e rings. I've also been on the receiving end of some critism about that, never mind the fact that my original e ring was poorly cut and had no sparkle, and my fh wanted to upgrade it to something nicer. Frankly I find that type of intolerance distubing. Now, upgrading the husband, that's a different matter I think that the wedding band is something that I wouldn't upgrade, however if anyone I knew decided to do it I wouldn't be upset about it. As long as my fh is okay with my upgrading I don't see any problem with it and fully intend to do it.


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Quote this post and reply to it Post#10 @ 03-24-04 , 05:52 PM


I know several folks who wouldn't mind a husband upgrade......

My first wife thinks she got one

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#11 @ 03-24-04 , 06:07 PM


Honestly, i don't even see the point of an engagement ring. Jewelry is jewelry, and getting engaged is just another excuse to get a new ring. I like it, i wear it... and if i want ten rings for my ring finger, that's my business.

I know plenty of people who don't even wear a wedding band because it irritates their fingers... does that make them any less commited to their spouses? Of course not!

Off topic, but did you know that men with wedding bands tend to get hit on more than men who don't wear a wedding band? I read that in a report regarding new "hunting trends" in young women. Appearantly married men are a lot more prized than unmarried ones. Disturbing, but something to think about, eh?


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Quote this post and reply to it Post#12 @ 03-24-04 , 06:23 PM


LOLOLOLOLOLO.....husband upgrades...yes! let's do a poll that asks who would like to upgrade their husbands!!!! Instead of asking for stats on carat and color weight, we could have height, weight, income, listening ability, cooking skills...!!!!!

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Woah!
Quote this post and reply to it Post#13 @ 03-24-04 , 06:55 PM


All I said -- and maybe it's a semantic issue irrelevant to this thread -- was along the lines of what Soon2BMD posted earlier. It's just the issue of the symbolism of the engagement ring qua engagement ring that bugs me re: upgrades. I take MaryAlaina's point well, that she uses the terms "e-ring" and "upgraded e-ring" here for clarification. But it rankles me to read that I'm being called "intolerant" because I expressed an opinion that was misinterpreted. I do not care how many times people switch their jewelry wardrobes around or change them as they can afford more or different rings.

Luluhb, I didn't imply, and don't think that your marriage is a sham! I don't know you and have no reason to have ANY opinion about your marriage or anyone else's. That's none of my business AND I have no evidence or interest in thinking anything one way or the other about your relationship.

And to MaryAlaina and Bubblykat and others, I want to clarify for all of you:

I also didn't say I was going to "wear the same ring forever." I thought I was pretty clear in saying that regardless of what happens in my future -- and I'm old enough to know that it's often d*** near impossible to predict what turns life will take -- this ring will always be my engagement ring. It's a small point and not one that carries with it a statement on what other people should buy/sell/trade/wear or even what *I* will necessarily buy/sell/trade/wear. For all I know, my tastes will change and I'll wear no jewelry in ten years. Or I'll save every penny I have for the biggest ring I can afford. Or we'll have to sell my engagement ring one day to pay for a new roof or health care!

(I guess in that case the piece of string I'd wear as a wedding band would be a "downgrade"...)

I think people should of course buy and wear whatever jewelry they want, on whatever fingers they want, and God bless them! Heck, I also said that if I can afford it I'd love someday to have several rings, big rings, different rings, whatever.

But again, and maybe it's a word problem, my issue is with the symbolic concept of "upgrading" your "engagement ring," not with buying more as you can/want to. And nowhere in here did I or do I pass judgment on people's relationships/engagements/marriages, just as I hope they wouldn't pass judgment on mine.

Last edited by OnLooker : 03-24-04 at 06:56 PM.
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Quote this post and reply to it Post#14 @ 03-24-04 , 07:07 PM


oh relax onlooker- I'm just being a sarcastic brat!

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#15 @ 03-24-04 , 07:23 PM


I do get hyped up when I start typing. Sorry.

....was one step away from getting out my old Contracts book to look for dicta that better summed up what I meant about the promise of the engagement ring.

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#16 @ 03-24-04 , 08:18 PM


Quote:
Originally posted by Pouffykitty
<snip>
Off topic, but did you know that men with wedding bands tend to get hit on more than men who don't wear a wedding band? I read that in a report regarding new "hunting trends" in young women. Appearantly married men are a lot more prized than unmarried ones. Disturbing, but something to think about, eh?


Pouffykitty,

Okay I can pretty much gaurantee I'll be flamed for this, but it is VERY true. I still have a plain platinum band from "my single days" that I often used to wear when I went out knowing that I would attract more attention from girls. Was it deceptive, maybe. Well yeah, it probably was. But I was younger and dumber then and I'd like to think I've grown up a bit. ...but yeah sometimes I do miss "the good old days" heh heh

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#17 @ 03-24-04 , 08:46 PM


OMG- did you just use the word DICTA in a sentence??? ... Wanna discuss the rule aganst perpetuities? (i probably even spelled it wrong lol)

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#18 @ 03-24-04 , 09:26 PM


Well, I guess I am in the minority here - I have an engagement ring. That's it. If I want another diamond, I have other fingers for it. Both my husband and I feel that my engagement ring , in addition to symbolizing our commitment, represents a slice of time in our lives. To change it would be like trying to change the past.

The way is see it...I have 7 other fingers (and two thumbs) to fill up with rings if I so desire.

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#19 @ 03-24-04 , 11:30 PM


Wow -- I sit here not knowing if I should even jump into this discussion! Here's a loooooong post:
I do not wear my original e-ring. I do not even own it anymore. I have changed or, if you will, UPGRADED, my original marquise 1.01 e-ring to a RB 1.51 and then last year to a RB 3.29. I am about to be wearing (almost finished) my 5th mounting. Yes, apparently I do have a sickness. I admit it. This is my one "habit". Seriously, if there was a support group for people like me who have a constant need to change,or UPGRADE, their diamond ring I would join. To be honest with you, I have already accepted the fact that I will probably never be happy with what I have in that department. When I first saw the cast piece for my new mounting a couple weeks ago, I was absolutely ecstatic. It even made my stone, of which I've never been very satisfied with (except for the size), even look really good. Then I saw the mounting again the other day -- this time I didn't love it like I did the first time. AND I HAVEN'T EVEN RECEIVED THE COMPLETED PIECE YET AND I'M ALREADY NOT SURE IF I LOVE IT!!! See, I told you I have a sickness.
To clarify, if people ask me if that is/was my engagement ring (I got engaged almost 14 years ago), I always tell them that it was not. I have never tried to pass off a current ring as my e-ring. My DH has never really cared about jewelry or diamonds or e-rings, etc. To him it is just jewelry, and not something that stands for something more meaningful. I guess what I'm trying to say is that the two of us have never really looked upon a piece of jewelry as signifying our committment, love, etc.
HOWEVER, I will tell you that I have been feeling more "sentimental" of late, and was actually thinking that I would like to re-purchase a marquise of similar specs to my original and wear it on my ring hand (set East-West). Why, after all this time and all the ring changes I'm feeling this way, I don't know. Maybe all of you who ARE sentimental about your e-rings has got me thinking! I have begun to feel badly about giving up my original stone. Although, I have to admit, when I go to the jeweler and look at a one carat, I know I wouldn't be happy with that size stone as my sole diamond ring. Look, I know I'm shallow. I wish I didn't feel this way, but I always have. I am a great wife, great mom to two kids with learning diabilities that I've really advocated for, do a great deal of charity work (and I'm not just talking about attending luncheons, but really doing the work), etc. I'm not some television stereotypical bitchy snobby woman flashing big diamonds around. BUT, I have to admit it is what I crave.
The thing is, I have ALWAYS been in love with BIG diamonds. My grandmother had 'em, and I dreamed of them since I was a little girl. I was the lucky recipient of her 5 ctw diamond studs. When I was getting engaged, I really wanted a two carat stone. My DH felt that a one carat was more in line with the budget at the time.
So, as soon as I was able (only about two years after getting engaged), I traded in my original toward the purchase of the 1.51 RB. This size made me happy for a long time (for me!). I wore that stone for about 12 years. Yet, I was still yearning for something larger. Now I have the 3.29 carat and I like this size a lot
The reason I always traded my stones in toward the newer ones is that, aside from using them as credit towards the purchase of the new one, I figured how many diamond rings do I need to own? If I loved the one I had, I'd be wearing it and wouldn't need to get another one. No point in having them sit in my drawer. I know MaryAlaina has MANY diamond rings, as does Susi, as well as some others. I think it is great, and I would love to be able to finally be at a point where I could say that I love the ring I have and want to continue to wear it, but would like to put money into owning another ring rather than always having to use the old ring toward the purchase of a new one. I am sure I don't even make sense at this point.
I know that some of my in-laws think I'm nuts. However, my DH's stepmom, whom I am very close to, has had three different e-rings, the latest of which is a 5 carat stone, so she doesn't think anything of it. I don't think my friends think anything of it. They see how successful my DH has been over the years and figures it just goes along with all the other material things, like the custom home, the luxury vehicles, the vacations, the private school, etc.
Please know that my DH and I are very happy together, still in love, our hearts still fluttering when we see each other after almost 16 years together (not that it is so long, as my parents have been married 46 years, but I guess in this day and age we're doing good). I may have a problem with changing my e-ring, but I will never change my DH. We have two wonderful sons, ages 12 and 10, and they are truly my real "jewels".
Thanks to all of you who share my passion for large and lovely sparklies, and thanks to all of you who have helped me to take a look at myself.

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#20 @ 03-24-04 , 11:58 PM


Headlight - I don't think anyone thinks you are shallow. Different people have different likes, dislikes, piorities and ideals. Its what makes us who we are. The "Diamonds as Symbols" thread took a similar look at things.

In the end - Everyone is here because we are alike in at least one way - we all love diamonds! Cheers!

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#21 @ 03-25-04 , 12:04 AM


Am I too old fashion (silly)? I always think that an engagement ring should be paid by a husband. Not paying from my own pocket.


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Quote this post and reply to it Post#22 @ 03-25-04 , 12:33 AM


Headlight,

More power to you. To have a good life with your husband and kids after 16 years is a wonderful thing. I am very sentimental about certain things, but that certainly does not mean those that are less sentimental are in any way wrong. My gf feels the same way I do about any ring I will give her, which is good. Even at that, she can't understand why I still have my old wedding band (I was married for 14 years, and many of them were good), as she traded in her old e-ring and band on a watch. Anyway, I digress - you have what is truly important, and it has nothing to do with what you wear on any of your fingers.

Pika, I agree with you wholeheartedly. If my gf was not satisfied with what I could give her for an e-ring, then she is simply not the girl for me (I'm luckier than some other posters here!!) I wasn't even going to tell her I was looking for an e-ring (though we had talked about marriage) until responses on this board changed my mind. I'm still not sure if that was a good thing, but that's for another thread......

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The RAP
Quote this post and reply to it Post#23 @ 03-25-04 , 01:43 AM


Oh dear. I did use "dicta."

I can guarantee you that I canNOT talk well on the Rule Against Perpetuities (sp?)...I studied that one for days and still totally screwed it up on my exam. So yeah, Luluhb, I can discuss it, but I'll flail and end up saying, "wait um it means you can't -- I mean you can -- I mean after a generation -- I mean -- can't we just talk about diamonds again?"

This whole thing (the e-ring thing, not riparian rights or the Mailbox Rule ) is fascinating because -- as today's frenzied posts show -- people (myself definitely included) people can get very wrapped up in the emotional and material components of the symbols of engagement and marriage. I guess that for some of us -- I know for me -- they can be real hot-button issues.

I guess the whole "upgrading" question is provocative by definition to some people, and everyone sees his/her jewelry in different contexts.

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#24 @ 03-25-04 , 02:41 AM


I voted in the < $1,000 range because that's all my husband had to spend at the time. We were engaged his sophomore year, my freshmen year, in college and saving even that much was great. He told me I had $1,000 to spend on the ering and we set off to find my dream ring. Unfortunately, my dream ring was a 1ct or more heart solitaire. $1,000 would not buy that. SO I lied to him and told him my dream was a 1/2 carat heart. Well, we couldn't find one in the budget and I settled for a 1/2 carat oval. He felt bad enough that I didn't get the shape I wanted and I certainly did not want to tell him I really wanted a stone twice that size. Luckily, I did not get the heart because I really don't like them set and I fell in LOVE with ovals! After two years of being engaged, 9 months of marriage, and 7 total years of being together, I broke down and told him I want to upgrade when we have the money and find a great deal. He felt bad I didn't have what I wanted and I actually regretted telling him. However, he's not sentimental and is OK with an upgrade as long as I keep my original stone to give to a daughter or daughter-in-law someday. I will have it set again as a solitaire and it will be my ering. I see no problems with upgrading if it fits the person.

Headlight,
Thank you for being the type of parent that advocates for their kids. It's parents like you who have changed the dynamics of special education! This is coming from someone majoring in special ed (and graduating next semester!) and sees parents who are not as active in their children's lives.

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Quote this post and reply to it Post#25 @ 03-25-04 , 10:22 AM


pikapika- it really turns into the same pocket!

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